Norman Ralph

Having arrived back from Sunrise on Monday, I had a day or so to recover before going to meet Liz in Lincoln and then us driving across to Kirkham to visit my mother, the first time that Liz and her will meet. This is quite a scary prospect as I have not introduced my mum to any of my girlfriends since Becky (not that I have had any serious ones, but I introduced Becky to my mum over eight years ago) so I was a bit apprehensive and Liz was actually scared.

Liz was supposed to be working until 9pm on Wednesday, so I had planned to head over about 7ish to avoid the worse of the traffic and take my time, before heading the 200 miles home. In the end Liz managed to wangle her shifts around so that she finished at 4 instead. This meant I could drive over during the afternoon grab some food with liz’s grandparents then amble back to Kirkham, getting in for 9ish rather than after midnight!

On arrival in Kirkham I introduced my mum to Liz and we sat down and had a cup of tea. Liz was really shy and didn’t really speak much which was totally understandable. Mum was really nice to Liz too, not really going OTT, which was one of my worst fears. We ended up crashing fairly early as I had driven 300 miles, Liz had been at work since 7am and my mum had had a long day too. Mum had put us in separate rooms, Liz in mine and me in my borther’s room. When I had been arranging the weekend with my mum we had never really discussed sleeping arrangements – just a difficult subject to broach really – but I wasn’t going to push the issue anyway. For as long as I can remember my mother has had a fairly static policy on the subject and I decided that this wasn’t the time to circumvent it.

Thursday was a really nice day, didn’t really do that much – got up, had lunch, went to pub to watch the cricket then headed out to dinner with my mum. We ended up at an “eat as much as you like” Chinese restaurant in Preston, which I really like as they do unlimited Peking duck and BBQ spare ribs to die for! Liz was a bit overwhelmed with the experience I think, she isn’t a great eater at the best of times, especially when she is a little nervous or self-conscious.

On our return from the restaurant we sat down and watched a film, Jack and Sarah, which is a really nice couple film. Unfortunately I had developed a really bad headache so had to go to bed fairly early again. Liz was amazing and looked after me and basically made me feel better. She is good like that.

Friday was a busy day. We headed over to St. Anne’s to visit Lindsey who has recently given birth to a little girl. I am not usually a baby person but when I was sat there with Lucinda Faith in my arms I could actually see myself with a family one day. That was a mild reaction compared to Liz’s. I think she actually considered getting pregnant there and then!

We left Lindsey’s after an hour or so and headed to Freeport in Fleetwood as I needed some bits and bats and I wanted to drive the length of the Fylde Coast from St. Anne’s to Fleetwood to show Liz Blackpool and my old haunts. I am not sure she was overly excited about the whole thing, but at least she has an idea of my past now.

I cooked dinner on Friday and then my mum sat Liz down and spent the evening (over four hours) showing her photographs of me, David and a few other things – ranging from baby photos to holiday snaps to school shots. I think even my mum got bored by the end!

Liz and I headed back to Leeds on Saturday morning as it was Kirkham Club Day so had to move my car before 9am. We drove back along the A59 as we were not in a rush, we had nothing to do until kieran’s BBQ at 3pm.

I think it was an amazingly successful few days. I think my mum and Liz get on quite well and I really hope they approve of each other. It was nice actually spending time with Liz in a domestic setting too. As much as I love my house in Leeds it isn’t very homely, or private!

Blackpool 2 – Yeovil 0

That insignificant looking scoreline made yesterday into a great day in the seaside resort of Blackpool’s history. Their football team is playing in the top two flights of English football for the first time in thrity years. Yesterday afternoon’s League One Play-off Final at Wembly was a great game. Blackpool played the best football, they passed and moved and generally played at a Championship level, their footalling home for the next season at least, Kiegan Parker’s second goal being absolutely sublime – curling it round most of the Yeovil defence and goalkeeper from twenty-five yards!

Following the conclusion to the football game, Liz and I hopped on the 95 up to Woodies to meet Chris Clarke and do a mini Otley Run. Playing “no repeats” rules, we made our way through Three Horsehoes and New Inn. Due to the fact there were three of us we decided to give Arcadia a whirl, it is a small Wine and Ale bar just next to Somerfield in Headingley. We were so impressed with it we stayed for two drinks!

The Arc and Sky Rack were absolutely heaving, so after a swift drink in Headingley Taps, the Box and Original Oak we jumped on the bus and headed to Hyde Park Corner. We were planning to keep going on the Run, but having done some negotiating we headed up to Izzy’s to help her celebrate her 22nd birthday.

There was a house full of people when we got there, a mixture of Leeds and Kirkham folk. Inf act it was a remarkable turn out. After a Dutch courage drink, I decided it was time to bury the hatchet with Izzy. I hope I got my message across, the right mixture of apology, sincerity and humility yet maintaining enough dignity for the apology to carry some weight. I cannot be sure of the outcome of what we talked about, I think we decided not to dwell on it there and then as it was the middle of a party. We did, however, get an invite to the after party in town. Unfortunately, the afternoon’s excitement had taken its toll on Liz so I had to take her home.

I have worked out that when I am with Liz I barely post on my blog. It just seems that I have better things to do than relive my fairly tedious life for all to live when I am with her. I have seen that this tends to be the case with many bloggers in relationships.

I wish I could say that this trend was limited to blog posts, but it has also come to my attention that I have been spending less time on WoW, less time in the Old Bar and also less time in general moping around on my ass all day doing nothing at all.

I have noticed that my mood has improved though and my productivity in areas such as work and A-Soc. I think this is probably due to the fact that I now have a future to think about, I have responsibilities!

That is such a scary thought. I think the past month (how long Liz and I have been going out) has really forced me to grow up. I have developed a new zest for life, a desire to succeed and achieve something. I want to get up in the morning, something I have not really felt for years. I am not sure how noticeable it is to those who know me, but I can definitely notice the change in myself, I am happier, chirpier, generally more chipper!

Regular readers of my blog will be aware that I have recently embarked on a new relationship with a lovely young lady called Liz. Well, for the past week I have been staying with her at her Nan’s house whilst her grandparents are away on holiday for a couple of weeks. The reasons for me staying are two fold, a) it gave me an opportunity to spend some real and quality time with Liz away from the pressures of Leeds, friends and family and b) it gave me an opportunity to recharge my batteries and take stock of my life in a relaxed atmosphere.

I think both reasons have worked out for the very best. Liz and I have really gotten to know each other this week in the way you only achieve through spending time together. Having the house to ourselves was a real bonus, it has led to our relationship really developing into a beautiful adult relationship. Liz is a pretty good host too, she brings me cups of tea in the morning! Although, to be fair, I have actually done most of the work in terms of cooking, cleaning, washing etc and I have decided that Liz only really wants me for my car – it seems my chauffering skills are second to none, literally as there is no one else!

The second reason has almost been as amazing. I have really gotten to know myself through letting Liz get to know me. I think I am now in a position to move forward with my life, to start again as it were. The future holds many challenges for me and until recently I would have shied away from them and stuck my head in the sand. Now it is different. I am up for the challenge, I am relishing the challenge and most importantly I am willing to fight for what I want and fight to win.

The week in Potter’ has been relaxed although not entirely without action. Liz and I arrived from Leeds on Sunday afternoon and chilled out for most of the afternoon, we had take away – which wasn’t really up the high stabdards of Milano’s but not entirely inedible, after watching some telly we ended up going to bed relatively early. Monday was fairly standard too, didn’t really do all that much apart from a bit of shopping and some work. Tuesday saw me head back to Leeds for the morning, I picked up some quality newvinyl which gives m an excuse to update my hi-fi system, which is in the process of coming to fruition. We ended up going out into Lincoln with Liz, Edd and some of Edd’s friends to a club called Sugarcubes. It was a dive. Your standard student rock based night. Cheap drinks though at £1 for a bottle of lager/soft drink. Liz got very very drunk and I took her home. We were both quite ill on our return and as I hadn’t been drinking I wasn’t convinced it was the alcohol.

Liz returned to work on Wednesday after a few days off due to stress. Whilst she was there I did some reading and caught up with some work. A few problems occurred during the evening, none of which are really suitable for discussion here. Thursday was a faily quiet day, we watched the Lincoln City vs Bristol Rovers play off semi-final 2nd leg and I was a little dismayed to see Lincoln lose. Lincoln are not my team, but as I have several connections to the city, I have a certain affection for the club. A couple of films and a late night later we arrive at today, Friday. Liz is at work from 4-9pm this evening and then I imagine we will be heading back to Leeds.

Our plans for the weekend include watching he Blackpool game on Saturday, followed by the FA Cup final then Wendy House. Sunday will be a chilled out day then liz will head home whilst I get on with some chores and errands. Finally, I thought I would mention the fact that I have tickets to see The Who!!

You may have noticed that I have not blogged in a few days, that is down to the fact I have been running round the country like a headless chicken generally procrastinationg from doing any work of any kind.

I headed home to Kirkham on Tuesday to pick some stuff up ready for the festivals I will be working at over the summer. I also combined it with visiting my Mum, who I have not really seen properly in ages and also seeing Lindsey, an old friend. Lindsey is nine months pregnant and was due on Thursday – still no baby! We went to the pub for a couple of hours and i got to feel the baby! I have never felt one before it was born before and it was definitely a wierd experience, though I now feel a certain attachment to the little thing, which is probably not that unusual as Lindsey and I have always had a kind of father/daughter relationship. We met about eight years ago at my friend Jon’s 17th birthday party, she was fifteen. She used to come out with us to the pub etc quite a lot and although she weas occasionally a bit of a handful I developed quite a close relationship with her. I have not seen her in ages and was really good to catch up. I would just like to add a quick “Good Luck” to you, Lindsey and all the best for the baby!

Thursday saw me drive over to Lincoln from Kirkham to see Liz. Liz’s grandparents are away on holiday and liz is not the most domesticated person in the whole world so I was going mainly to make sure she ate, tidied, did the washing etc, but also because I missed her – I hadn’t see her in four days, which is a long time for us! I met up with her and Edd in Lincoln as they had been shopping then we headed back to Liz’s for some tea. We ended up driving back into lincoln to Edd’s house so we could go to pound a pint night at Scream on the waterfront. It turned into a really glood night, we all got nicely drunk. Liz fell in a bush and we ended up crashing at Edd’s/ Very funny night all round.

Friday was seriously chilled out. After heading back to Potter’, we had lots of tea and Liz napped whilst I did all the domestic stuff like the washing up and a couple of washing loads. We set off back to Leeds for B’s birthday at about 8pm. On arrival we stuck a DVD on and went to bed, the last day or two catching up with us.

Saturday was Bryony’s 21st. Her mum and auntie’s had invited Liz and I to her birthday dinner (Liz and B are childhood friends) at Bellini’s in Adel. It was a really nice dinner and a good opportunity to meet a lot of B’s family. The guestlist included B and Chris, her mum, dad and little brother Joseph, three of her auntie’s – Elaine, Carol and one I can’t remember and Liz and I. After dinner (which was delicious!) we were invited back to Elaine’s house in Menston – which is miles away. We had some tea and a good chat, the kind that you get at these kind of events and then headed home about 7pm.

We picked up some party food and a little drink and headed back to B’s with Chris to have a little birthday party. It was nice for us all to be friends again, although some of the conversation topics were quite scary. Wedding rings, engagement rings, joint holidays and family homes were discussed! Oddly enough it felt fairly ok to talk about this stuff, I think there is a future for the two couples!

After B threw us out for some sleep, Liz and I had intended to go out with Sophie et al in town, but when we got home we were too tired, so put a film on and eventually crashed out with pizza and coke.

All in all it has been an exciting week but hardly productive. I really need to get some work done, both professionally and for some of the projects I’m involved in. I think i’m going to be in Lincoln pretty much all next week so hopefully I will get some done without the distractions of the big city. As lovely as Potter’ is, it is not exactly the liveliest plaxce on Earth!

Liz and I went to the Wardrobe last night to see Soweto Kinch and his band play. I wouldn’t normally have thought about this gig as something I would go and see, but after Kieran’s review a few months ago when i saw the name I headed straight into town and bought me some tickets.

I am really glad that I went, the tickets were a bit on the pricey side at £14 each and the Wardrobe is definitely no the cheapest place to drink in Leeds but even so, the atmosphere is amazing and the gig itself was second to none.

Soweto Kinch is a saxophonist and an MC, backed by a quartet consisting of a trumpeter, guitarist, bassist (double and electric) and a drummer. They have a totoally unique style of jazz music, combining the funky side of jazz with hip-hop and rap. Kinch’s talents as an MC were clear to see and were especially evident during the free-style piece he did at the end to photo’s submitted by the audience. These skills were, however, eclipsed by his sax skills. He produces a rich, clear tone with an ability to really make the music touch you. At times I was completely lost in the music.

The band was also brilliant and I feel that special mention must go to the bassist who was by far and away the best bassist I have seen live in any genre of music. His skill on the double bass was frankly awesome, the speed and complexity at which he produced spine tingling riffs and beats created the sort of bassline that you just cannot ignore. I occasionally feel with some jazz bassists that they kind of wish they had learned the trumpet or something, but this guy’s passion was obvious to everyone.

The set list was superbly designed, giving a real mix of flavours yet somehow managing to get everything to gel so smoothly that you lost track of time and totally forgot you were in a crowded club.

There were a couple of highlights for me, first I agree with Kieran’s choice of “The House That Love Built” and I also have to say that I loved their final encore piece, I can’t remember the exact name but it was something about a basketball game. The piece was basically a solo off between the trumpeter and saxophonist and I have to say they were both winners, we were treated to five minut solo’s from both musicians, interspersed with some of the finest drumming I have had the pleasure to see and hear. Every track was a journey of music, each with a story to tell. A totally awesome experience.

The night was rounded off when the band came out to sit in the bar with the audience that hadn’t run out the moment the set finished. All of the band members I spoke to had a great sense of involvement with the crowd and were more than happy to sit and talk to everyone – a feat that I wish some main stream pop/rock artists would try sometimes.

I bought their album and even managed to get Soweto to sign it for me – one for the collection, or it would have been if I hadn’t given it to Liz who had a really great time. I found out she is a regular in the Jazz Bar in Lincoln. I took a risk buying the tickets without asking her first, but it looked like the gamble paid off. This has to go down as not only one of the best gigs I have been to but also one of the finest dates.

Thanks to Soweto and the gang for making a good night out unforgettable!

My blogging has been a little sporadic recently, not just that, but it has also been a little disjointed. I apologise for this but I have good reason. Things have been going on that couldn’t be openly blogged about and I have been a very busy chap indeed with one thing and another.

Firstly, it is official (because Facebook says so) that Liz and I are going out. We have been for a few days now but unfortunately circumstances dictated a certain amount of discretion. people needed telling in the right order. The right people know, so now the world can know.

There is a story to be told about how this happened and came about but it is not to be shared here, memories are still too fresh and people involved do not deserve to be hurt. Today is the beginning of something beautiful.

I took liz home on Sunday and met her parents and brother. We also ended up meeting Ed and heading to the pub. It is quite a nice little pub and you cannot go wrong with 40p games of pool! Had a cup of tea with Liz then headed home. I hate leaving her.

Monday saw me start fulfilling my duties as A-Soc secretary and also meant getting fed by Sarann. Sarann is an excellent cook and made a delicous sausage casserole followed by rice pudding. The pub followed, which wasn’t the best experience all round. A few demons surfaced and they took some sorting out, I ended up crashing at B’s.

Met MC and went to the cricket this morning, watched the Second XI game. I left about 2pm and headed to uni for a faith and cultural assembly meeting – which was postponed without notice (well everyone but me and Chris got notice). We then had an A-Soc committee meeting followed by a general meeting, Was quite a good meeting and we got lots sorted out. Just need to write the minutes up now…..

Liverpool beat Chelsea!

This last week has been pretty wierd. Monday saw one of the lowest points in my life and today I am one of the happiest people on the planet. I have met someone really special and I think the circle has finally worked itself out, I think that everything is finally falling into place.

I’ve been thinking about today’s blog title for some time and have even penned a few drafts to go with the title. However, I never really found the right words to make the most of what I think is a really poetic line. That is until today. I think I am finally starting to understand a lot of what has been said to me over the past four or five years, a lot of lights have been switched back on at the end of a lot of tunnels. I think that I have rounded that corner in life where you finally move past being a teenager and start thinking like a real, grown-up adult. This may sound strange to some of you as I am a twenty-two year old who occasionally comes across as even older. To those of you know me in some depth will probably understand what I am saying a little better. I have lived a good life, I have seen a lot of things and been to many places. This occasionally makes me a litte world weary, even at this age! I don’t think that this is a true reflection of my age. There is a difference between having grown up in the way I am talking about it and the image that those around you see.

I am now thinking in terms of responsibilities, of how to make sure I get the most of this life in order to best enjoy the rest of my life.

I’m not naive enough to suggest that this is an overnight process, I think that this is the start of the transition. Something that will take time. I am glad it is happening though. As much as I enjoyed the last few years, I want more from my life than hangovers and dodgy memories. More than beer trophies and debts.

Liz came back to Leeds last night and we went out with Chris and B to the last day of the ale festival at the Old Bar. It was a really nice evening, even though too much beer was consumed! Claire joined us for a bit, but I get the impression she felt a bit out of place. To be honest, I don’t blame her for that – B and Liz are old school friends so even Chris and I felt out of place at times!

So, as my title says “Sometimes you have to lose before you win.” This makes more sense to me today than at any other time. I am not sure whether I will still feel this way tomorrow, but for today, it works.

Thursday saw the start of the Old Bar’s Festivale. Liz, Michelle, and I headed down to sample the wares and take part in the quiz. They were running sixteen cask ales and four cask ciders, a real treat of proper drinking! They were also running a variety of games and promotions. I won two Black Sheep T-Shirts!! It was unfortunate that most of the circle had coursework deadlines so couldn’t be there.

Headed back to mine afterwards and watched Silent Hill with Liz, it is a really bizarre film. I don’t really understand it, so of anyone out there would like to comment on the story line then please freel free! Fell asleep about 4am.

Went for lunch on Friday with Liz and Michelle then dropped Liz off at the station before meeting up with Claire in the Old Bar. I have not spent much quality time with Claire in ages for one reason and another. She has had dissertation and practical work to finih, then spent three weeks in Japan! It was really good just sitting down and having a few drinks with her again!

We were joined for a bit by Graeme and Sarann before they headed off to finish their coursework. Maths Chris popped by and had a drink or two before heading to bed!

We eventually joined up with a crowd about 9pm, Matt, kat, Sarann, Michelle, Kieran, Heather, Worfolk and a few others – turned into a really good old fashioned piss up at the Ale Festival. Time flew by and before we knew it we were all quite drunk and getting kicked out!

I had nothing formal on yesterday, a few bits and bats that needed sorting out but nothing pressing and essential. I like these kind of days, they can turn out quite well sometimes. It did!

I was woken up with a message from Chris, suggesting The Library for lunch. Not our usual haunt, but I quite like it in there. With two hours to kill I set about sorting out some admin. Got some emails sent off, confirmed a few bits and sorted out about a weeks worth of post.

Midday rolled round so I headed down to the pub where Chris and I were joined by Sarann and Michelle. Was quite a chilled lunch, although I was dismayed that they are changing their menu – seems to be a trend amongst food places in Leeds. They are changing their burgers and adding more variety apparently.

Following lunch, I headed over to Essentials to get the paper and then headed down to the cricket. I am a season ticket holder at Yorkshire County Cricket Club and this was the first home game of the season. Caught most of the first day of Yorks vs Durham – got there just after the lunch interval and stuck around until about 5.30pm. Yorks had a really good day, Durham won the toss and elected to bat and were 117-3 at lunch. They were eventually bowled out for 247. Abdul Rashid taking five wickets in a glorious spell of slow bowling.

The evening was spent watching the second Champions League semi-final in a packed out Old Bar. Chelsea snuck the result, winning 1-0 at home to a really good Joe Cole tap in following a Drogba run. I think Liverpool should edge the game at Anfield, so this could get interesting. I really hope Man Utd hold off AC Milan next Wednesday and we get an all-English final!